"Hey Sam, when did I buy 'The No Asshole Rule?'"
Sam imped, "You bought into that theory a long time ago, before you married me!"
"Funny, funny! It was still front and center at the airport. It could be a 'good read' for executives."
"You mean parents," Sam said. "That sounds like your motto when the boys were growing up."
"True," Simmy agreed. "Hey, I remember now... I purchased it as reading material when I had that hemorrhoid surgery and I was having trouble getting respect at work."
"Ah, 'Ode to the Hemorrhoid,'" Sam used a dreamy voice heavily laden with mockery.
"You mock, you mock! When I start selling that poetry you won't be laughing anymore. Dr. David put that poetry on his wall. It's not every day a colon specialist gets an urban dictionary portrayal of his work, you know."
Simmy's mind drifted off to that day... sitting in the examining room of Dr. Colon... door opens...
in walk Dr. Colon and Dr. Military... Simmy gulped...
"Would it be alright if Dr. Military sits in on this consult? The government is pairing us up with military doctors so they can get more experience."
Simmy smiled and agreed... but her thoughts were...'What? Are you flipping crazy? Do you really think I want my ass looked at by 2 of you? This can't be happening to me... humiliating... take the high road, take the high road, for King and country... Queen and country... you can do this...'
After the consult, Simmy had hurried out of the office just wanting to get into her car and hide her red cheeks. She breathed a sigh of relief as she got into the elevator... but, the celebration of escape came too soon... Dr. Colon and Dr. Military came out of the office and Simmy stared at this one- in- a- million- improbabilities- situation. They were headed towards her elevator.
A deer in the headlights look propelled Simmy's finger to repeatedly push the button for the main floor, praying that the door would close before she had to take the elevator with them. But, no, God was in the mood for Simmy to get some fodder for a good story... Are you forgetting that I'm a little shy, God?
As they joined Simmy in the elevator, men just don't get it, Simmy smiled congenially and then... Dr. Colon asked for some 'life advice,' his personal life.
Divert, divert,... Simmy was thankful to be able to click back into 'thinking mode.'
That elevator ride was the longest Simmy had ever experienced.
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